Abby Region
1 Jim$ v 8 Muary Fucking Povich
Jim$- Defending Gentleman of the Year
- He's a fucking gentleman
- Someday, people will tell tales of the Dierck$en administration and I will say that I was proud to be alive in such an era; properly coined as "The Dierck$en Era of Prosperity"
- Tried to not run this year
- A 3x godfather
- Only person to ever make Rick drink
Muary Fucking Povich
- Is an excellent golf teacher
- Likes college girls
- Believes Maryland would make more money if the cheerleaders cheered topless
- Has determined the paternity status of countless people
4 Original Jim$ v 5 Mike's Pizza
Original Jim$- Wealthy.
- Got beers for us when bar was closed.
- Supports the LG.
- Owns a country club.
- Has supplied us with many free meals.
- Invented the "cool breeze" style basketball lay up (behind the back under the legs)
- Excellent financial consultant
Mike's Pizza
- Makes the food of the gods
- Has never made a bad slice
- Is kept in business by Rick
- When he went on vacation for two weeks. Rick cried
3 Jurgen v 6 Arnold Palmer
Jurgen- Hosted a gentlemanly gathering at his palace
- Bought coffee for everyone
- Busted out the Jameson Special Reserve so we could have Irish coffee
- Vanity. $1600
- He would like to speak to a representative at the front desk so he will call someplace else. Thank you have a good night
- He is also a warrior having sustained the most bruises and cuts out of all of us.
- Steinbrenner of the CoG
Arnold Palmer
- Bobble Head Night
- Invented the most gentlemanly drink of all time
- Also a golfer of some note
2 Joyce v 7 Dayman
Joyce- People were leaving, it was the leaving time and people were leaving because it was the leaving time and people were leaving
- Called Olivia angular
- Got trapped in a rape van
- Kinda looks like a Carlos
- Bought Dmo and Ostrowe White Castle
- Allowed JMac and Ostrowe to spend 24 hours on his couch, and cooked us burgers
- Came up with the idea for the Chilean miner costume, end result being us showered with applause and picture requests
- His dance push up at Jim$ wedding led to another person doing a dance pushup
Dayman
- Fighter of the Nightman
- Champion of the sun
- Master of karate, and friendship for everyone
Tata Region
1 Ostrowe v 8 Isiah Mustafa aka The Old Spice Guy
Ostrowe- He doesn't desecrate the flag.
- Has a gentlemanly bachelor pad in Nyack
- OLH. OBT. O _ _
- El jefe do los mineros de Chile
Isiah Mustafa
- http://warmingglow.uproxx.com/
- Most gentlemanly of deodorants/body washes
- Is on a horse
4 Hutter v 5 BP
Hutter- He bought me a tits tshirt
- He's wealthy
- He banged natalie
- He owns the borgata
- He bought daryl underwears.
BP
No Reasons
3 Anfron v 6 Rob the Bartender
Anfron- Especially due to this email which I am not sure if we can post online or not
- Speaking of which I am 2 seconds away from bamgiong a ligeit again
- Send the CoG awesome foreign emails
- Asians love boozing. My bauce tried banging an asian banker and he tried to get me to bang her assistant
- Moved from a cube to his own private office
- Big Time
Rob the Bartender
- Enjoyed our shenanigans
- Kept serving all of us even though we were clearly hammered
- Chanted "T!I!T!T!I!E!S!" along with us
- "T! I! T! I! ... Wait I fucked up"
- Teach me how to Dougie
2 Mar v 7 John Hamm
Mar- I've concluded that the only thing better than big titties is....BIGGER TITTIES!
- Was not sober once in Vegas.
- Taught a hook how to dougie so she wouldn't steal his camera
- Discovered that Night Fever makes all the girls take their clothes off
John Hamm
- Incredibly handsome
- Makes Mad Men one of the most critically acclaimed shows on television
- Excellent SNL host
- Handsome
- Appeared on two of the first 3 episodes of Conan
- Quite handsome
Precious Region
1 Rick v 8 Nikko
Rick- Randomly created and scored a sheep.
- He takes criticism and corrects his playlist.
- Volunteers his time at ARC to chaperone events, whereas ARC = the COG and events = any gathering of the COG
-Keeps Mike’s Pizza in business
- Kept Mar and Joyce alive on the streets of Baltimore
Nikko
- Es el Capitan de Los Cosmos, and Fall 2010 Champion Coed team
- Always happens to be at a bar when his friends are about to leave
- Introduced the world to "Heathers" and assorted hangouts with no formal signs on them.
- Hip style of dress, yet not a "hipster"
- Proverbial Expert on all things related to NYC nightlife
- NYU Degree
- Columbia Grad School Degree (pending)
- Goes by Kyle Mou
- Won Rick a slice of pizza by misspelling “Schizaffin”
4 Enrique Iglesias v 5 Brock Singleton
Enrique Iglesias- Baby he likes it
- Escapar
- This is premature
- He bangs Anna Kournikova.
Brock Singleton
- Challenged Jim$ to a cotton candy eating contest at a Pirates Game
- Let us stay in his house that smelled like piss
- Took us out in Pittsburgh to meet college chicks
- Has a dog that a stripper left at his house once after sleeping with him
- Shit his pants on the flight back from India this summer
- Defended our country and takes down Big Lenny
- Drives without a shirt in West Virginia.
- A true gentleman.
- Lemonadey!
3 Jmac v 6 Keenan
Jmac- Brought imported onion dip to Daryl's Mansion Warming Party
- Created "Daryl's Mansion Warming Party" song
- Brought Mrs. Joyce flowers for mother's day
- Chipped in for Mother's Day dinner with the Ostrowe family
- Rich
- Handsome
- A Godfather
- Only person to hook up at Jim$ wedding
Keenan
- Muscle
- Darts
- Bangs fat chicks
- Likes TK
- Let Ostrowe borrow his jacket to walk home after his was stolen
- Gave me a futon and coffee table when I moved into my apartment
2 Poppers v 7 John Heim
Poppers- Clubster
- Can grow a fantastic wedding beard
John Heim
- His engagmenet party was a booze cruise around Manhattan
- He has a pool that he lets me work from in the summer time and always provides cold budwesiers.
- He is a former bartender at Fitzy's and Walsh's
- He's also marrying a boatload of money, smart man.
- Met Poppers once. Punched him really hard in the chest
The Redhead Region
1 Dmo v 8 Jason Derulo
Dmo- Beat up Criss Angel
- Won millions in Vegas
- Looks at chicks applications
- Run the Gentlemanly Fantasy Football league
- The cornerstone of the CoG
- Owner and operator of Club Tit$
Jason Derulo
- Has released three incredibly catchy hit singles from his debut album
- Amanbsa likes that song where he says his name
- He's ridin' solo, he's ridin solo
4 Goon v 5 Gary Williams
Goon- He is a top chef
- Popped the shirt off during our badminton screwjob loss
- Always Sunny is his favorite show
- He has great Ts
- "How much does a polar bear weigh? Enough to break the ice. Hi, I'm John."
Gary Williams
- Bangs college slimmies
- Likes to eat wings and booze
- Works for a gentlemanly university
- Was awarded the 2010 ACC Coach of the Year
- Made the fist pump cool before Jersey Shore
3 Eddie O v 6 Extra Hour of Sleep
Eddie O- He is married to a gentlewoman.
- He drinks straight bourbon.
- He is a known gentleman.
- He scored 4 touchdowns in one game.
- He just got peg a fork.
- Squats 400 lbs. at the gym.
- 500lb if listening to Baby I Like It
Extra Hour of Sleep
- Allows us to be less winded throughout the day
- Is an extra hour for Dougla$ to count his millions
- Is an extra hour for the ac/heat to distribute through anfron's corner office so that the temp is optimal come Monday
2 Daryl v 7 Colin Cowherd
Daryl- "I just built Rio the Snowman. He is lacking all major appendages including stick arms. He has no carrot nose because I was too goddamn lazy to get a carrot, and I lack coal or a corn cob pipe to complete the illusion..."
- "I usually disappear into convenience stores and show up at the bar again, 45 minutes later, holding a bag of Doritios. This is what I'm told happens anyway"
- Taught his kidney spanish so it could play on the Mets. It batted .294 with 10 HRs and 72 RBIs. .992 Fielding Percentage
- 6 Martinis at the wedding
Colin Cowherd
- Reasons to follow. There on a post it on my desk.
May the god bless you forever
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