Vegas Baby Vegas

In the politically correct world we live in, there is still one place where anything goes. Vegas. Before the end of the year, Dmo, Mar, and Terry will be heading out to the City of Sin. Now, when we go out in Rockland, bad things tend to happen, it's called the Piccinich Effect. But throw in the debauchery that happens in Vegas, and you get a story that I can't wait to write about. So after dusting off my crystal ball, I took a look into the future to see just what will transpire.

5:34 Dmo gets into his limo and heads over to pick up Terry. He pulls into the driveway as Terry calls his phone. Terry says that he has something in the oven and that he is going to be a few more minutes. Over the course of the conversation, Dmo finds out that Terry got home from Bruxelle's 30 minutes ago. When he finally comes outside, he has no signs of a hangover, but his Grizzley Addams Beard is in full force. It's early this year.

6:00 Mar comes out of his house with only a backpack filled with clothes.
Dmo: Bah, Is that all you are bringing
Mar: Bah, I'm Winded
Dmo: Bah, We are going to be there for almost a week
Mar: Bah
Dmo: Bah

6:20 On the way to Westchester Airport, Terry moves Mar's bag so that he can get a drink from the bar and he notices that his bag is ridiculously heavy. He opens the bag and sees that it is filled with $2000 watches. Maybe this explains why Mar is always so winded.

6:45 Everyone boards Dmo'$ private jet, fun fact, the Sultan of Brunei once got the pleasure of seeing the plane and decided that he too wanted one just like it.

7:45 Mar is winded. Terry is still drinking.

8:00 Local Vegas time. After watching the Blue Man Group perform on the plane, the group touches down @ McCarran International Airport. Of course Dmo has arranged for a limo to come pick them up. Originally the plan was to stay at the Bellagio. However, Mar found out that the Stratusphere Hotel has a hot tub filled with good looking girls, that he claims will take their tops off. They sound like prostitutes to me, but hey, this is Vegas.

8:45 The bellhop leads the gang up to their penthouse on the top floor of the hotel. As they walking into the room they walk past a plaque reading: "The James Dierkensen Suite." Terry toasts the plaque.

9:52 After some pregame which was urged on by Terry, they decide to hit up Sonic. Since there are no Sonic's in the northeast, but plenty of Sonic commercials in the northeast, Sonic is in high demand. And you know the best part, Sonic lives up to it's hype. It may be 9:52 in the morning but in Vegas there is no such thing as time of day. Everything is fair game at all times. If you want to have Ice Cream for breakfast, go right ahead, no one will question you. Terry orders a vodka and Red Bull with his burger and Sonic comes through with one.

10:49 Everyone finally makes it to the casino. They decide to start off slow with a few hands of blackjack. Terry gets $300 in chips, Dmo cashes in $500, Mar throws down his watch and gets $2000 in chips.

11:15 The house always wins. Terry is down $100, Mar and Dmo are down $200. However, as this old couple sits down at the table, business starts to pick up. The dealer busts on 10 straight hands and now everyone is on the plus side of the dial. Terry stands up and walks away with his beer in hand. Dmo and Mar play a few more hands then head over to the craps table.

5:00 After six hours, Mar is up $600 and Dmo is up $850. The pit bosses have taken notice and offered the two of them dinner at the finest steakhouse the Stratusphere has to offer. They walk over and remember that no one has seen or heard from Terry in a while. They shrug it off and head into the restaurant. After a four-star meal, Mar whips out another watch and leaves it as a tip.

6:45 To cap off dinner, Mar convinces Dmo to go to a fund raiser being held a little ways down on the strip whose mission is to help girls pay their way through college. They walk in the door and see Terry sitting in the VIP area. He explains to them that he just got to talking to random people strewn about the casino and before he knew it he knew the owner of this establishment. Something only Terry could pull off.

7:00 It goes without saying, but in case you forgot, Mar is winded.

8:00 Mar wants to go check out the hot tub at the Stratusphere so he and Dmo head back up the strip. It is impossible to get Terry to leave. When walking up the street, Dmo get drunk dialed by Jim$. He tells him that he is having a late "supper" tonight with Abby and ShaBAHn

9:00 Upon arriving at the hot tub, Dmo and Mar are greeted with a sign that says: "Sorry for the inconvenience. All the girls that used to fill this hot tub went home with Jim$ after his last visit." Dejected, Mar and Dmo decided to continue gambling.

1:00 On the east coast its 3:00 am and Mar and Dmo have been up for nearly 24 hours. They are up a combined $2000 on the day, not bad for day one. They decide to call it a night. Odds are that Terry is passed out in some gutter somewhere, but no one is worried, Terry has a knack for always getting home. The two of them make it back to the suite and quickly pass out in their respective beds.

3:00 Terry enters the suite with a loud crash finally showing the effects of the alcohol. He has gotten 3 hours of sleep in the last 48 hours and hasn't stopped drinking. Most people would be dead, but this is the Boss we are talking about. In a drunken stupor he walks into Mar's room and climbs on top of the dresser and gives Mar a Super Fly Snuka Splash.

This is how things will go for the entire trip. Who knows if they all come back alive, but one thing is for sure, this is going to be a trip for the ages.